The Elven Wedding

The Elven wedding begins a few days before the actual ceremony.

A feast is used to celebrate the union of all elves. We normally have a Rehearsal Dinner one or two days before the wedding and then a Reception after the ceremony. Elders come to give the honored couple many gifts at the feast. It is also customary for the father or honorary person of the bride to lay her hand in the groom's hand. To show it's a public declaration of their consent to the union, a symbolic way of saying, "I give you to this man." This is something equivalent to wedding invitations that edanea may use. There is singing, dancing and poems are also recited at the weddings..

Elves usually wed once. Through the passage of time they may be parted for any reason they are always bounded to each other. Those who would afterwards become wedded might choose one another early in youth, even as children. Unless they desire soon to be married and are of fitting age, the betrothal awaits the judgment of the parents of either party.

In due time the betrothal is announced at a meeting of the two houses and the betrothed exchange silver rings one to another. According to the laws of the Temple of Eru Iluvatar this betrothal is bounded, standing for at least one year, and it often stands longer. During this time it could be revoked by a public return of the rings, the rings then molten and not again used for a betrothal. Such is the law, but the right of revoking is seldom used, for we elves do not traverse lightly in such a choice. We are not easily deceived by our own kind; our spirits being masters of our bodies, we are seldom swayed by the desires of the body only, but are by nature continent and steadfast.

After the betrothal it is the part of the betrothed to appoint the time of their wedding, after at least one year has passed. Then at a feast, again shared by the two houses, the marriage is celebrated. At the end of the feast the betrothed stands forth, and the mother of the bride and the father of the bridegroom joins the hands of the pair and blesses them. For this blessing there is a solemn form, but no mortal will hear it. The parents name the Varda in witness by the mother and Manwë by the father; and moreover that the name of Eru is spoken (this is seldom done at any other time). The betrothed then receive each other’s silver rings and in exchange they offer each other slender rings of gold, which are worn upon the index of the right hand.

It is a custom that the bride's mother should give to the bridegroom a jewel upon a chain or collar; and the bridegroom's father should give a like gift to the bride. These gifts are sometimes given before the feast.

These ceremonies are not rites necessary to marriage; they are only a gracious mode by which the love of the parents are manifested, and the union is recognized which would join not only the betrothed but also their two houses together. It is the act of bodily union that achieves the marriage, and after which an indissoluble bond is complete. In times of strife elves may even have informal unions. This is rarely done but in the case of war.